Despite the layers of wallpaper, the overcrowded rooms, the chipped paint on the exterior I loved you from first moment I first saw you.
When I bought you I was broken and trying to pick up the pieces of a shattered heart and destroyed dreams.
For 8 years, 6 months, and 4 days I called you home.
You helped heal my heart, kept my pups safe and warm in the winter, hosted family dinners, baby and wedding showers, withstood a tornado, hurricanes, and blizzards.
You stood empty for months as I traveled the globe, opening your arms as I walked through the back door when I returned home.
You gave me everything you had.
I thank you and I honor you.
This past weekend I cleaned out two storage containers full of artifacts, letters, cards, and mementos I have held onto for years. These containers have moved with me from state to state as I worked my way to Seattle and back home again. They sit in whatever garage or basement I have available collecting dust as I moved on with life.
Lately I have been feeling the weight of them, a weight I no longer want to carry.
On Saturday morning I opened the first box, examining each item as I pulled it out. Playbills and pictures and letters, all evoking a memory stored deep in my mind.
Old friends long forgotten.
Ex – boyfriends who once wooed me in handwritten notes.
State championships lost and won.
Then I found the email. An email from a very young love after we decided to discard each others heart.
After giving the email another read I realize he was not strong of enough to stay with me through a down period in my life. My smile faded for a minute and he count not handle it.
The words were right there on paper for my eyes to see, process.
All these years I carried this weight of him with me, on Saturday I finally let him and all my report cards go.
Directly into the recycle bin.